Manhattan

New address, new roomie. 530 West 47th Street #3C NY, NY 10036. Send me stuff.

Living in the city is much better for me. I love that it's just steps away. What's just steps away, you ask? Well - everything! I walk home through the very north of Times Square everyday and I. Love. It. Love it! My apartment is little and cute and comfortable and my roommate is awesome. She gets me and still lives me. We can watch LoTR and Aladdin and Brothers and Sisters. I'm a lot more broke and taking my lunch every day but I. Love. It.

My job is getting better - I've been given a lot more work and now I do about 3 times the amount of stuff I used to do. I am not bored but sometimes I'm so stressed and I wonder if it's worth it. I hope so. I try to comfort myself with the infinite options that await me outside of the office but I remember that a new direction would require me to be decisive about my future. And my indecisiveness isn't news to anyone. So - just staying the course for now. Hopefully someday I can live more comfortably.

I went home a few weeks ago - I was really worried about the whole bittersweet emotional rollercoaster that I feel everytime I go home but it wasn't so bad this time around. Which is also bittersweet. I used to cry as the plane left JFK. And then I'd cry on the way back until I saw the NY skyline. I hate coming and going. I hate that "home" is so far away but that "happy" is here. There's a little of both in CA and NY I guess ... Anyway going home this time wasn't so emotional.

I've been thinking about how most of my relatives ask why I like it here - no family, such extreme weather changes, so many more strangers and dangers. I can't really explain why I love it here. It's just something you feel when you're here or not. Todd and I will be walking around town and I'll say "I love it here." It's a very packed statement and he says "I know" and I know he totally gets it. Mom gets it too I think.